Spam just cracks me up. Anytime I need a little chuckle, I visit my spam page and check out the ridiculous responses to posts on this blog.
I don’t really understand the purpose of spam…I guess it is to get us to click on their address link, where they are selling something, and their hope is we will go, “Oh wow, I didn’t mean to click on this link, but what an EXTRAORDINARY website I’ve discovered. I should look around. And while I’m here, I may as well buy something. I’ve always needed 5,000 sporks”.
Here are the spam comments I have in the queue right now. The name of the post is at the top IN BOLD ALL CAPS, spam underneath for that particular post, and then my witty sarcasm in bold italics. Enjoy!
A LITTLE AFV TO GET YOU THROUGH THURSDAY…
I discovered your weblog web site site on google and appearance some of your early posts. Preserve up the excellent operate. I just extra increase Feed to my MSN News Reader. Searching for toward reading far a lot more by you later on!
My weblog web site site thanks you you.
QUEEN, PRINCESS, AND BEEOTCH OF THE WORLD DAY…
I used to be suggested this website by way of my cousin. I am no longer sure whether this post is written by way of him as no one else know such precise approximately my difficulty. You are wonderful! Thank you!
Aww, I’m wonderful? The post is about Mother’s Day and only your male cousin knows the precise approximately of your difficulty? Hmmm…
IT’S NOT TOO LATE, I CAN STILL BECOME AN OLYMPIAN?
Just want to express this specific post is striking. The standard in your post is simply amazing and i could believe you may well be an expert for this subject. Nicely with your agreement permit us to grab your current feed to maintain up to date using incoming write-up. Thanks a thousand and be sure to keep the great work.
Did you not read the title of this blog? I’m not an expert at anything!! And thanks a thousand? I don’t rate a million?
A LITTLE SPAM TO CHEER UP YOUR MONDAY…
Sidenote: Who knew a post about spam would generate the most spam? Can’t wait to see what I get from this one. 
Would you be inquisitive about exchanging links? Nope. No I wouldn’t.
Unquestionably believe that which you said. Your favorite justification appeared to be on the internet the simplest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get irked while people think about worries that they plainly do not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top as well as defined out the whole thing without having side effect , people can take a signal. Will probably be back to get more. Thanks
You definitely get irked when people think about worries that they plainly do not know about? Control freak much? I hit the nail upon the top? Yay me. And you will “probably be back”? I’m so honored.
I am writing to let you be aware of what a brilliant experience my cousin’s girl developed using your web site. She discovered several pieces, with the inclusion of what it is like to have a great giving nature to make others quite simply understand several extremely tough subject areas. You truly surpassed my expected results. I appreciate you for delivering such productive, trustworthy, educational not to mention unique tips about this topic to Kate.
Omg. I truly surpassed your expected results? Would you mind calling my boss?
My wife and i felt so excited Chris managed to conclude his homework from your precious recommendations he made from your very own blog. It’s not at all simplistic to simply continually be giving away techniques which people today could have been making money from. So we acknowledge we now have the website owner to be grateful to for this. The most important explanations you’ve made, the straightforward website menu, the friendships you will aid to instill – it is everything overwhelming, and it is facilitating our son in addition to our family reckon that that situation is amusing, and that is tremendously fundamental. Many thanks for everything!
Ok, so it is not at all simplistic to simply continually be giving away techniques which people today could have been making money from? You may send me $8m for my services, should I give you an address for the check?
I and my guys ended up reviewing the excellent thoughts from your web site and at once developed a terrible suspicion I had not thanked you for those secrets. Most of the ladies are already as a result happy to study them and have in effect undoubtedly been tapping into these things. Appreciate your turning out to be simply thoughtful and then for having such smart themes millions of individuals are really eager to discover. Our honest apologies for not expressing appreciation to you earlier.
Millions of individuals are really eager to discover? Could you just give them my website address so they can stop searching?
Super-Duper site! I am loving it!! Will come back again. I am bookmarking your feeds also
Aww, super-duper?? Does that come with a gold star?
Thats some nice informationI would like to read more about it. computer repair computer repair computer repair it support it support it support computer desktop repair
Who said anything about computer repair it support it, Rainman? Speaking of youlovethisblog subliminal messages. I’ve got an expertofnoneisyourfavoriteblog idea for a subliminal messaging post. Stay tuned nevereverleaveme.
Thank you a lot for giving everyone an extremely terrific possiblity to read critical reviews from this web site. It is always so brilliant and stuffed with a good time for me personally and my office friends to visit your web site at minimum three times in one week to read the fresh things you have. Of course, we’re usually amazed concerning the mind-blowing things you serve. Certain 2 facts in this posting are absolutely the simplest I’ve ever had.
There’s a whole lot of adjectives in that paragraph…so I’m extremely terrific, brilliant, fresh, mind-blowing, and absolutely the simplest? Not sure if that last one is a compliment or not, but ok. Who needs to pay for therapy? People should build their self-esteem from spam.
I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was good. I don’t know who you are but certainly you are going to a famous blogger if you aren’t already Cheers!
If I were already wouldn’t you know who I was and how you ended up here?
Hello.This post was really interesting, especially since I was searching for thoughts on this topic last Thursday.
So the post wouldn’t have been interesting had you not googled it last Thursday? Fibber!
TWO THINGS…DON’T TOUCH MY MOMMA…DON’T TOUCH MY DORITOS!
\”We Respect Justin’s Hard Work\” He does so much for us and we all are so grateful. This album is going to be amazing.
We’re talking about doritos, not beiber.
allaroundtheworld is an oasis song. & he has the cheek to take a band of such a higher calibre & ruin their song title.Don’t respect Justin
Haha, the post has a kid named Jaden in it, not Justin. Guess I triggered the Beiber Fever people.
Hello, i think that i saw you visited my site thus i came to “return the favor”.I’m trying to find things to improve my site!I suppose its ok to use some of your ideas!!
Um, no…didn’t visit you (stranger danger)…and no, it’s not ok to use some of my ideas. By the way, you really shouldn’t use the term “return the favor”, it just comes across as, well, creepy. I think I’ll go shower now.
Honey–can I steal the “no one else know the precise approximately my difficulty?” Sounds very e.e. cummings-ish to me
Here is the link to what I did with it…..http://wp.me/p2lN8u-t0
How AWESOME is that??? Absolutely love it! Thank you Susan.
My pleasure
LOL! Quite lovely…those spammers sure are creative, eh? haha.
And steal away!!
lol to all of the above….. Thanks for sharing = )
Thank you, that’s what I said!
This made me laugh out loud!
My mission for the day…accomplished! Thanks for the visit and nice to “meet” you
Nice to meet you too.
[ Laughs ] Wow! You seem to get the most interesting set of spam.
Thank you for posting!
I think we (on wordpress) get all the same blog, depending upon on tags and content. The Akismet program automatically moves all comments with two or more links in it to the “spam” folder. I had to find the folder and look through it to see this and they just cracked me up! I had to share.
Not long ago, I got the very same “comments” you list above; plus a bunch more. I hope for your sake, that’s all you get…. ’cause I got around 90 of these idiotic statements… I deleted them as fast as I could and haven’t seen anymore… I wonder how many other folks got a dose of this “wasted time” …?
Yep, I was just telling Renard I think we all get the same ones depending upon our tags and content. And honestly, with akismet, you don’t even have to see them in wordpress. It moves them all for you to a “spam” folder…but I’m so glad I read them. Gave me a real good chuckle!
LOL…You make me laugh out loud. I thought I was the only person getting these weird messages! The always cautious and suspicious me is always afraid of virus applications, porn and thousands of other things, I quickly hit delete and never link!!
I’m so glad you like them! I get a kick out each one. And yeah, we all get them and you’re right to be suspicious. I don’t click on any of their links. That’s how they get to you…we just have to laugh from a distance.
More spam (though you may have seen this one already) – I nominated you for the Sunshine Blogger Award this evening. When you get the chance, please check it out: http://jefflisakbooks.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/finally-gettin-some-props/
That’s NO spam!! I’m honored, thank you. And btw, I’m a stats watcher, too! OCD is my name….:-)
How is it possible to mangle the language this way? It sounds like what happens when I click translate on Facebook. Bing makes my Belgian niece sound like a moron.
That is EXACTLY what I was telling some fellow bloggers yesterday. I think it is originally in another language and then put through a computer translator. It’s like it has gotten it into proper English, but that doesn’t mean it is correct or even right for the situation. The example I gave yesterday was something like, “I see your cat” becomes translated to “I cat visualize you”. Or something like that, but I think you’re exactly correct Joyce!!
It’s amazing I have never met a spammer in real life. Who are these people and where do they hide? Are they ordinary citizens like us? They are most likely sitting inside a bunker somewhere in the wild. Craziness…
I know, right?? Even if the actual messages are computer generated and then translated a million times, who does the programming? I’d like to meet them.
I recently had four days away and upon my return home had 79 spam comments nearly all identical to the ones you have written about.
Funny thing is though, they were all for the one post on my blog.
May not be a good idea to blog too much about my Kindle!
LOL! Yes, it is crazy how buzz words will attract all the spam. Usually the word “spam” gets them pretty good, but I imagine kindle, ipad, ipod, and nook type words are all huge magnets!
[...] a wry and hilarious blog post in June 2012 about the strange spam that we bloggers receive, called “Holy Spamalot, Batman!” For a good giggle, take a quick trip over there. It’s definitely worth your time.) Share [...]